Hey Single Squad!!! I know that right now during this pandemic dating can be something else. Sometimes it can feel as if things are moving fast because your time may be limited to actually get together in person and get to know someone. Perhaps there has been a lot of time texting and talking but maybe you’re feeling like it’s not giving you an understanding of where the relationship is going. Maybe you have been dating since before the pandemic and now it’s getting serious. And the last time you were dating, things moved too fast or maybe you’re thinking that I don’t have time to waste with someone who isn’t the one for me. You may not even be dating currently but just want to make sure that when you do, you’re ready. I know that you have been looking for a sign or some clarity and here it is because you know I got you! I want you to make the most of your dating by not wasting anymore time on someone who may be around to just have something to do or who isn’t ready for a relationship. But I also want you to be ready too. The last thing I want you to do is spend time where there is no growth happening. You deserve better. So, what is that we need to look for to know if he is the one?
How does he treat other women in his life? This is a great indicator of how he will eventually treat you. Most times, within the first few months of dating someone, they are really polite and responsive because they are trying to get to know you or at least keep you around. We all tend to be on our best behavior during this time. But something that cannot be faked is our treatment of people. Does he talk badly about female family members or coworkers? Are there issues between him and his mom? Is he a great father to his daughters? As we know, actions speak louder than words. And although you may not witness this all at once, it is helpful to be on the lookout of how he treats other women. It can be a reflection of how he will treat you.
Is it lust or love? Now this one has a little more to do with how you view him and your interaction with him. Do you genuinely care for him or did he sex you up and that’s what’s holding your attention? Now, I do not recommend having sex while dating because it can distort your view of that person. Have you ever been in a relationship and months, perhaps years later you wondered, “How did I not see that this is the way he is?” or “How was I so blinded even when everyone was telling me that he wasn’t the one for me?”. I like to call it lust goggles. It prevents you from seeing the red flags that are there in plain sight. You also need to know whether it is lust or love for him too. His actions will tell you. And only you will know if it is lust or love.
Have you dated him “before”? Is he the typical guy that you usually date? This is usually a pattern and sometimes we need our singleness (actually not dating and being by ourselves for a period of time) to get out of these habits and drop the lust goggles. Usually we develop a habit of dating the same type of guy and it never works. What qualities do you need to have a healthy relationship? We usually forgo our needs if the guy is handsome, but that sexiness is not going to keep your relationship going. How can dating someone that you might not have thought about dating, who has the qualities you need, change the way you view who the one may potentially be for you?
I hope that this was helpful for you and that it gave you some clarity to know if he’s the one or not. Think about these things and use your discretion. You got this!
I hope that these ideas have helped you and allowed you to look at your singleness in a different way. Don’t forget to check out my 5-day challenge, “Are You Ready? The Single Squad’s Guide to Dating in 2020”. It is a free challenge that will give you tips on how to date in 2020. Click the link now to get your copy today! https://payhip.com/b/Ak0z